Google Me

I’ve been trying to do a better job posting regularly this week. It’s been a while. Know that I’ve missed it but I couldn’t think of anything interesting and some days I was just too busy to squeeze the time in (see posts on my dog). But you’ve been missed and I will make a better effort.

So in this frame of mind I decided to take a look at what kinds of searches brought people to me in the hopes that it would enlighten me as to what you would like to read about and maybe serve as some kind of inspiration. I have to say that I think some of these searchers and I would get along very well. Also, a lot of people seem to think that Dutch people are insane because that is a common search that brings you here. Here are some of my other favourites:

·         Umbrella smells

·         Video Russell brand homeless man jerk off

·         Hangover policy

·         Jobs for people with extreme patience (not sure how this brought anyone here though)

·         Gloria bridezilla unibrow

This really is a safe space for all people. But sadly I don’t know what to write about for those of you looking for unibrows and homeless jerk offs. Good searches though. Creative. Hope you eventually found what you were looking for?

Today I forgot that there were going to be a bunch of clients in the office that I would have to dress nice for. It’s my Friday so I’m wearing jeans. But subconsciously this morning I must have remembered something because I managed to dig heels out of my closet and pop on a blazer. From my ankles up I look respectable and I’m comfortable, a masterful combination.

Ankles down it’s a different story. My heels were taller than I’ve worn in a long time. Turns out that when clients are in the office I run around a lot more than I’m used to. So my pretty feet were running around in size 10 torture devices. The round toe that make my clown feet look petite became frilled foot prisons, rubbing the skin off my toe knuckles. The nice little cushiony rubber bubble things (some might call them insoles of some sort) for the balls of my feet suffocated my swollen dogs (dogs as in another word for feet) until I could barely even fit them back in the shoe. And thanks for a skyscraper pair of shoes I tried on my knee is a little messed up, aggravated today by the height of the shoes I had chosen.

Solution? Flip flops. Which are no solution in an office. So my feet are tucked way under my desk and whenever I need to run back down to the meeting room to ensure the clients’ are accommodated I force my poor feet back into the shoes and hobble over. Until they can see me and then I walk proud hoping that no one can see the tears of pain in my eyes.

Also? My nails are a disaster. Someone actually asked me if I painted my nails with white out. I did not. But I can see how people might think that.

I need weekend. Thankfully, for me, it’s here.

PS if you have time (and you do) click here and do some good for the world.