Roosters

I am not a morning person.

That might be the biggest understatement that ever was. I can’t say for sure, I don’t live with me.

In so many ways, the Boyfriend and I are alike. Values and stuff. Also neither of us tan. At all. There are also many ways in which we are different. He’s Mr. Clean, I’m more likely to be slovenly. He’s a runner, I’m a couch surfer (at least I mostly was until we got Hugo). He was captain of his high school basketball team, I was in public speaking.

But all of these pale in comparison to our differences in the morning.

He’s one of those “let’s take on the day” kind of people. The kind that when doesn’t need an alarm because they get up before it goes off anyway. The kind of that gets right out of bed the moment they wake up/the alarm goes off. I’ve been told that he might as well get up because he’s already awake.

Which, to me, sounds insane.

I run more to the snooze button side of mornings. Once upon a time I used to set my alarm for 6:25 even though I didn’t have to be up until 7:00 just because it took me that long to gradually wake up. The snooze button went off every 10 minutes. Can you imagine living with that? Yeah, I’m not allowed to do that anymore.

We manage to work around the other on week day mornings. We leave at different times, have different responsibilities. The Boyfriend deals with all dog related business and I try not to walk into walls or fall down. Sounds simple, but you’d be amazed at how stumbly I am when I am drunk with sleep. My eyes are unable to focus, my reflexes are slow and my spirit? Broken from lack of sleep.

But on the mornings where we get up early to either get things done or go away somewhere we have to coexist. And this. Becomes tricky. We’ve come up with a few ground rules to get us both safely through the morning.

1.       All outfits are to be selected in the evening.

2.       Any required packing is to be done in the evening.

3.       There is to be no talking until caffeine is introduced.

These ground rules go a long way to saving the relationship and getting me safely out the door.

But I still don’t like mornings. And I don’t think I will ever learn to be good at them.