Sad Men

I've been back at 'er for almost 2 whole weeks.

In a lot of ways this new gig is really different. I listened to co-workers run in and out of an office this afternoon, screeching and laughing as they tried to help a guy choose an engagement ring for his girlfriend. 'Tis the season for engagements folks. The weird thing was that they were all having fun and no one got mad at them for it. People genuinely seem to like where they work, which is really different.

But many things are also the same. The blaming of other people (the poor 'green' [as in new] Receptionist is an easy target) for when you can't get your sh*t together enough to get your job done. The hours filled with nothing more stimulating than solitaire or the Vancouver Sun website (which, while interesting, doesn't exactly take a long time to read through).

I work with mostly men at this new job and that's something very different. They are all really smart with things like building bridges but when it comes to mailing a letter, they have no idea where to start. So it would follow that some of these gentlemen might have some...let's say challenges when it comes to dressing themselves. Obviously they have more worldly concerns on their minds than matching the belt to the shoes.

Here are some pointers for the gentlemen:

1. A rain poncho is never a good idea. OK maybe if you are at Niagara Falls, its a good idea. But if you work downtown, and you don't want to get wet, maybe an umbrella would be better, or a proper raincoat. Something with sleeves maybe? Definitely not a rain cape, and definitely not one that's pea soup green.

2. Pocket protectors, in theory, are a great idea. In practice they make you look like a huge dork. Just stop.

3. A man should always double check that the barn door is closed. Triple check even.

4. I'm not a fan of the short sleeved dress shirt. I feel like you should just get long sleeved dress shirts and should the need arise, roll up your sleeves. Not only does this project an aura of getting stuff done (literally rolling up your sleeves, get it?) it just looks so much better. When you are a grown a$$ man and you wear short sleeved dress shirts you automatically look like a little boy on his way to church.

5. Wearing a light coloured dress shirt and neglecting the undershirt is bad. Michael Jordan wears undershirts, undershirts are cool. There is no excuse to forgo this basic foundation garment. I don't like to see your nipples through your shirt, I find it uncomfortable. If I have to wear a bra (which I hate) then you have to wear an undershirt.

So yeah. A break from ragging on the office whores. I'm all about equality.