Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Frame 1, Me 0

I went to Ikea yesterday. We meant to get shoe racks (to finally unpack the box of shoes that have been sitting in the hallway since the end of July- my feet have been looking like hobos) but walked out with a mirror and a picture frame that I just had to have.

(We did end up getting shoe racks but not at Ikea. Wal-Mart bitches!)

It was so pretty all hanging up in the Ikea marketplace with its flower picture. The frame happened to be the perfect size for this print that we had picked up that we have had trouble finding the right sized frame for. It was meant to be.

Lesson learned: sometimes the Universe just puts things out there to f*ck with you. She needs to have fun just like the rest of us.

So we get the frame home and it somehow becomes my job to put this picture in the new frame. Simple job yes? No. The Boyfriend got the simple job--putting together the shoe racks. And he needed power tools.

First of all, its not glass in the frame, its a static-y piece of wobbly plastic. I am not sure how I feel about this at this point. I now know that I hate that piece of plastic with a vengeance. The plastic is covered with a protective layer of plastic on both sides. I should have known I was in for it when the frame came with instructions.

I think regular people would have taken the protective plastic off the inside of the frame, put the picture in it, closed it up then removed the protective layer on the outside.

But I am not regular people- I am blonde. And as such I reserve the right to march to the beat of my own drum and make simple things 100 times more complicated than they need to be.

As soon as I peeled the second protective layer off I could hear all the dust particles in my apartment cling to it. This is probably not a good sign. Next I attempted to put the plastic back into the frame with very limited success. It either wouldn't make it past the little stick up-y things that keep the picture in the frame, or it maneuvered its way through the frame to the other side. Apparently during this time the frame, which is not made of strong stuff, was shifting. If you picked it up on one side, that side was pulled away from the rest of the frame.

I finally managed to get the plastic, the picture and the back all sealed up and was ready to glory in my home improvement skills.

Due to the static there was a hair right in the middle of the picture. I would need to re-do the whole thing.

I needed to punch something so I went to the bedroom and beat the hell out of one of my pillows while The Boyfriend shook with laughter. Then I slammed the door and yelled at him for laughing.  but I calmly resisted the urge.

In the end I was successful.

Successful in getting The Boyfriend to finish it for me. And then he hung up my mirror.

I needed a drink.

So I had 2 and then I went to see Gaga. Who blew my mind. Again. She is incredible. If you ever have the chance to see her, take it. Record- did she change your life??


  1. Since you called me out right here, right now, I will go ahead and admit that while I was not a huge Gaga follower pre-concert, she has won me over. What an amazing show!

    Sorta makes me wonder why you dedicated your post to a lousy IKEA frame instead of recounting the awesomeness of the concert?

    If Huey Lewis & the News get more coverage in the post tomorrow than Gaga did today I'm going to have to start questioning your unemployed sanity. As a concerned friend of course.

  2. I didn't want to make other people jealous with the awesomeness of Gaga when they didn't get to go. PLUS as per previous experience, it doesn't do any good. People can't understand it unless they are fans or they have been to see her.