I'm having a really hard time this week. I'm sick (I think we covered that) but more than that, I am sick and tired of being here. I don't know how much longer I can handle working here. I'm hoping that I win the lottery this weekend. Its one of those days where I grab onto my lottery winning fantasy (the one where I don't show up for a few days, then decide to come in, haul everyone into a meeting and call all the d-bags out one by one before yelling I QUIT to the heavens) and hold on for dear life. This fantasy is the only reason that I am currently able to sit here and calmly type.
Actually there is nothing calm about the way that I am typing right now. I'm like a madwoman. I can't get the words out fast enough. I am P O'd.
I am filled with a burning hatred of everything and (almost) everyone in this beige building. I would like to start a paper fire. This place would go up so fast. Maybe I shouldn't be writing that on a blog...For the hall monitors out there- that was a joke.
In recent posts I have been fairly harsh on Veronica. Today I feel bad about that. Veronica has no real power, she is in a terrible relationship and worst of all, she is a lifer. But I don't think she means any real harm (I reserve the right to change my mind). My issues with Veronica mostly stem from her stubborn disregard of manners and common sense and her stupidity (which she is totally proud of).
However, my energies would have been better spent watching out for Amy.
She is so sneaky, so cold, such a f**king b***h. I kind of want to hurt her. As I mentioned, yesterday I was late again. This was again because of insane bridge traffic and I was stuck on a bus. There was nothing that I could do (short of walking, which would have taken longer and probably would have killed me considering I'm still pretty sick) so I had to sit on that bus and watch the time tick away. I felt slightly better than when this happened last week because I was never penalized for that and thought that somehow Amy had managed to gain some perspective.
Its like she was waiting, just biding her time to pounce on me and rip me a new one.
So I know how this goes. I need to let them know ahead of time that I am going to be late. At 8.16 (I know the exact time because I have a record of the text) I texted Amy- Hey, I am stuck on the bus, will be late. Do I get a response? A "thanks for the text" courtesy reply? Any acknowledgement that I did what I was supposed to? Oh, no I don't. I finally get to work a little after 9, admittedly 40 minutes late. I'm not sure what I am supposed to do about this though, its like when it snows at my house. I live on a mountain in a city that does not do well with snow so when this happens the buses just stop running up the hill. But I'm still supposed to get to work somehow. I'm pretty sure I won't get reimbursed for a cab and I'm pretty sure I will die trying to walk down, but I need to get to work somehow.
Apparently I should have walked.
Amy comes over when I am at my desk, how are you feeling blah blah blah. Not one mention is made of the fact that I am late. Nothing. So I figure that, like last week, I am in the clear.
I am on my last break of the day (yes, I still took my breaks, I put up with way too much crap here not to take my breaks, even on days when I am late) and when I return at 4.20 I see that Amy sent me an email, subject: Late.
"Glad you are feeling a bit better today. Please let me know how you plan to make up the time for being late this morning? Thanks"
Well I get pretty annoyed when we have talked in the course of the day and you choose to passively aggressively send me an email at the end of the day about making up time. So I said that I would take a shorter lunch and no breaks tomorrow (today). And went on to say that I wish she had told me earlier in the day that she was planning on making me make up the time. I also needed to add that its out of my control when the bus that I take every day gets stuck in bumper to bumper traffic and that getting out and walking in would not have made any difference.
I thought Ha! that will show her!
But Amy has been practicing being passive aggressive for about 30 years and I only really started getting into it about 1.5 years ago (oh wow, thats how long I have been working here. That must just be a coincidence). She is much better at it than me.
This morning, when I got here at 7.45 (brainwave: I got here 45 minutes early, breaks and lunch for me!!) another email was waiting for me. This one had words like protocol, communicate, regular occurance, precendence and ownership in it.
She actually thinks that her driving to work and me taking the bus is the same thing. Its not. When you drive and you get stuck in traffic you have the option of turning off and taking an alternate route. When you take the bus and its stuck, you are kind of hooped. Apparently when she is late she always makes up the time. Not that anyone a) notices and b) cares. I'm also confused about last week. It was the exact same thing. Same amount of time. I would bring it up but I'm pretty sure I would then be in the hole for double the time I'm making up today. If I was chronically late, I would obviously need to make a schedule change (with the bus I take), but I'm not. In fact, more often than not, I'm 10 minutes early. I don't get that time back.
Currently there is silence on her end. I'm pretty sure that she won't bring it up again. But if you have been reading this for a while, you know that I should never assume anything.
If you are a manager and you are reading this, do me a favour? Don't be an a**hole to your employees. Make allowances for late buses. Don't be passive aggressive. Hopefully Amy will realize the error of her ways and she will remove the stick from her a**. Until then, I can still dream about my lottery win.