Thursday, November 26, 2009

Holiday Mayhem

I swear that I have a good reason for having been so delinquent with posting.

Are you ready?

Maybe you had better sit down.

Already sitting?

Stalling? I'm not stalling. Why would you say that?

OK here we go.

I was hit by a car.

You should know that I am back at work today so it wasn't that bad. But it was bad enough to miss 2 days of work.

Whats that? You want to know how it happened? I guess that's only fair, since I left you hanging for 2 whole days.

It was a rainy day. I decided that I wanted to get outside for some fresh air and start my Christmas shopping. The more I can do in the evenings and on lunches the less I have to do on the weekends when everyone else is out as well. I don't like crowds of people and I especially despise holiday shoppers. Do you really not have anywhere else to be? Are you really walking that slowly? Its like they have never been in a mall decorated for Christmas before and their walking is impeded by the fact that they are staring at the sparkly things on the ceiling. Move it or lose it people!

Before we go any further I should point out that I do like Christmas. I enjoy the tree decorating, the food, having parties, going to parties, I love wrapping presents, the drinking is good too- in general I enjoy the season. I just do not enjoy hustling through the overheated mall with thousands of other people, standing in line and forking over hundreds of dollars.

But I digress. Where was I? Ah yes, getting a head start on the Christmas shopping. So Anna agreed to come along and like the gentleman I am, I was walking curbside (to protect the lady). We are crossing an alley between the streets and there is a car that is already half way into traffic, looking to turn right. Well she must have decided that she was too far out because she backed up. Right into me.

I got hipchecked by a car.

And before we get into all that, no I did not get her information. Its not like she even got out of the car. I definitely swore in her general direction, muttering to myself about incompetence as Anna and I kept walking, but failed to get her information (I can tell you The Boyfriend was not impressed with me. Might also have had to do with the text I sent about getting hit by a car. Technology eh? Turning us all into a-holes, none of us are safe). In the beginning I was too distracted by the pain in my hand (her car brand decal or whatever its called) smashed right into my hand- initially I thought it was bleeding but it wasn't.

When I got back to the office (Yes, I did manage to get some Christmas presents. I can cross 3 people off my list) I started to notice that my hip was bothering me.

I sent a message to Amy to let her know that, no big deal, I got hit by a car on my lunch.

To her credit she did come over to see if I was OK. But she did not suggest that I get checked by a doctor or take the rest of the day off (which would have been an hour at this point). Its more the offer that I was looking for here.

The next morning was worse. I did not even hesitate to call it in. I felt bad about abandoning you lot, but oddly enough, there was no guilt associated with my decision not to go into the office. When I called in yesterday, there was some guilt. But all of that is gone now that I am here (as I suspected it would be).

So what did I miss? Apparently there was a birthday yesterday, so I missed cake. There were doughnuts too (this is what Veronica told me was the important stuff that I missed. One track mind that one) I missed Veronica prancing around the office in a paperclip necklace. And other than that, I think it was basically business as usual.

Today I will do some catching up, try to figure out how to get rid of the red blinking light on my phone that says that I have messages when in fact I don't, hope that I don't lose my mind listening to Veronica go on about how important she is as she trains another newbie (this is like the 4th one in a month) and try to get through the day sans Anna who is MIA.

Just today and tomorrow before the weekend right?

PS Does anyone else in Canada find it weird to be working today? I started the day off watching the Today show and they were talking about the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade and I kind of felt ripped off that I had to work.


  1. Well I don't, but I'm sick :)
    2 days! Give me one. But you don't get cake and donuts to soothe your pain. That also means you won't get the sugar crash about an hour before lunch, so I think you have the better of it. How's your hip feeling? I should've asked when I msged you earlier. How inconsiderate of me.

  2. My hip is alright. Its giving me some trouble at work though. The best part was when this woman sat down next to me on the bus and totally shoved her back into my hip. I think she was carrying some bricks around with her.
    I guess you get one day but I swear, if you aren't here tomorrow I will come all the way out there and hurt you.

  3. Wait a minute--

    This may sound really stupid....


    Do Canadians have their own version of "The Today Show" or do you watch ours?

    Don't take this the wrong way, but that's kind of like New Jersey sponging off of Philadelphia's news stations.

    And the Today Show is shit. I hope Meredith Vieria chokes on a sweaty martini olive.