Yesterday I was on the couch suffering from excruciating cramps in a stuffy hot apartment.
It was awesome.
A sign of what my working life has become that I would rather be in pain at home, then not in pain at work. At home in my overly warm apartment I didn’t have to listen to John’s voice. Or get patronizing emails from him. At home I had the comfort of Maury –you think you have problems. This guy slept with sisters and now he doesn’t know if he’s both of their baby daddy!
It was so nice yesterday. Just me and my pain. And crap day time television. What a magical day.
Today am back to it. Had some nice emails waiting for me from John. What a tool. Apparently he has become concerned with my mental health. What a dipshit. I mean really. Who does he think he is? I would worry about my mental health too, but I’m too busy trying to keep it all together. And looking for a new job.
Which brings me to the thought that is rambling around in my head today (thank you Anna for putting me on the right track). I love Bridget Jones Diary. Love it. And today it’s a scene in particular that is putting happy thoughts in my head (hear that John? Happy thoughts for once). You know that part where Bridget gets a new job in television? And she quits her current job, the one where Hugh Grant has been parading his fiancée around all the time? She walks out of his office and quits in front of everyone. Has snappy comebacks too.
That is my fantasy. I think I want to do it in front of everyone. I want to leave a trail of open mouths behind me as I go. I want to just stand up and tell them all that actually I don’t have to take this s**t anymore, I quit. And then I will have some snappy comeback to John’s entreaties for me to stay.
So if you live in my area (and you know if you do) and you have any contacts in the publishing world please please let me whore myself out. I am a good writer (don’t judge me solely on this blog, its written by the seat of my pants in moments of time snatched from my daily grind), I learn quickly, I’m hilarious, work well as part of a team or on my own. If you know anyone in PR, that would work too—I can spin anything. TV. Communications. Anything creative like that.
Until that day comes, I will just keep reliving my quitting fantasies. And avoiding group lunch dates like that one that is going on right now. Eating with John? Please. That’s enough to make anyone lose their appetite.
I think you should go after my dream job. Propaghanda writer for the Chinese government! Think of all the fun you could have with it? Civilian up-rising? No problem! It was just angry workers who weren't being paid their wages by the american company owner! Once the local official showed up everyone calmed down because he spoke with the president and got them their paychecks! Cue the happy photo with the 6 year old boy!
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