The Fall Out

You should feel the atmosphere in here today--yes feel. Its tense, heavy, anxious. Amy came in for her morning chat and she was stone faced- its been a while since she has been so stone faced. Lilly asked her if she was going to quit, and she didn't answer. This is not good.

I think we're all feeling kind of vulnerable--yes we have been promised our jobs. But there is a timeline. 12-18 months. Seems like a long time doensn't it? Well it goes by quickly. I should know. Thats how long I have ended up staying here. Course that has felt like a lifetime...but it went by quickly. Does that even make sense? Probably not. I'm discombobulated (but what a thrill to find a reason to use the word discombobulated).

First thing this morning I got a call from one of our reps. Usually a pretty bubbly lady, one of those people that always has a smile in her voice. Today she sounded like she had been crying all night. And while I don't think that she was necessarily crying all night, I do think she had a sleepless night wondering what all will happen. She has heard not very good things about working for the company that has bought us. And she is angry with the company for selling us. Because she belonged to a company that had to merge with us last year--needless to say that did not go smoothly.

And in the midst of all of this, of course, I have another meeting with John today. Part of our ongoing series to find out what makes me tick. Did I tell you that at the beginning of all this he actually told me that he had had no interest in getting to know me? Are you allowed to say things like that, things that betray personal biases, to people that work for you? He must have read that you can, that it increases morale or something, in People Management 101. Regardless John- the feeling is mutual.

Today we get to discuss what I would look for in my next job. I tried really hard to keep the sarcasm out...but it comes so naturally I hardly realize that I'm doing it. I did well too... for a while. I came up with: A more relaxed, less corporate work environment; Variety- working on different things each day so that no 2 days are exactly the same...and then it got a little blatant with: better pay and lower cubicle walls, more of a physical semblance of a unified team

Do you think they will notice the cynicism? Its pretty well veiled right?

It gets better. I'm also supposed to come up with the benefits of staying where I am. Benefits, benefits....oh I know!

A regular paycheque.

For 12-18 months anyway.