Its no secret that I find managers annoying. Its probably because I have so many-- 3 to be exact. Each believing that they are in charge of me. None of them willing to take any kind of responsibility.
Its a Manager's Paradise out here.
Over the past 4 years (my adult working life) I have had the opportunity to work with a few different managers. And I have never had a problem. I had heard horror stories about managers that were incompetent, irritating, mean etc but I had never experienced it, and quite frankly I assumed that my unfortunate friends were exaggerating.
Today, I know that they probably weren't. In all likelihood, it was worse than it sounded because one can never quite capture for another what its like to be under the tyranny of a power hungry incompetent snake. To those friends, I apologize for my lack of empathy and beg forgiveness for what has been an unending tirade of stories of my own horrible managers.
Now that I have apologized, I figure that I have carte blanche to continue whining about it for at least another 6 months.
This morning I took the time (3 minutes) to compile a list of the Management habits I find particularly offensive and annoying. They are in no particular order, but they do manage to irritate me an obscene amount of times during a day. So here is my list of annoying Managerial habits:
Hovering. I hate when they hover behind you. There is only one reason that they do it: to spy on you. And they can't even be honest about it. They always come up with excuses for it. "I just want to make sure that your arm is supported". " I wanted to see if you were having problems with the system". "I came over to ask you a question but now I have forgotten it." Don't hover! Go back to your desk and sort through the non-work on your desk before someone realizes that you are not necessary and gets rid of you. On second though, keep hovering (by someone else) so that the powers that be realize that you are superfluous and get rid of you.
Delegating. I have written about delegation before. I understand that one person is unable to do everything and that tasks need to be farmed out so that they get done. I don't have a problem with being given work when you are overwhelmed, on a temporary basis, its all good. But when you don't actually seem to do any work yourself, are constanly chatting with your favourites and talking on the phone after you read your emails out loud while simultaneously texting--I'm probably going to get annoyed doing your work.
Discussing Me in Front of Me. I'm right here. I'm a grown up. Please don't talk about me and what I will be doing today in front of me like I'm not sitting right in front of you. That's rude. I expect better of someone that makes more money than me. Seems backwards that I'm the one with standards and you're the one in charge doesn't it?
The Runaround. Don't you love when you have a question and you ask your direct supervisor, who asks your manager, who asks her manger what the answer is? Double points if your manager's manager asks someone else. Triple points if that someone else is your supervisor. Next time, grow a pair and make a decision. I don't have time to be standing around while you hum and haw and try to shirk responsibility. I'd take the responsibility but I don't get paid to. You do, man up.
Trying to be My Friend. We are not friends. I don't have friends that are a**holes. I get paid to come here every day, thats the only reason that I'm here. Maybe you like it here and you feel like you want to be everyone's friend. Tough noogies (oh yeah, noogies. I'm bringing it back). You can't be my friend. Why? Because you make my life hell, you nauseate me, I can't stand the sight of you and I kind of hope that you meet an unfortunate end. Not exactly a solid base for friendship. You are my manger (unfortunately) and I am your underling. There will be no contact when I leave and I'm hoping to keep contact to a minimum while I am still here.
So there you have it. Habits of Management that annoy me. I should add one more: breathing.