Thursday, May 13, 2010

Best News Ever (And Other Random Thoughts)

This week has kind of been a rollercoaster. So probably you haven't been getting the usual dose of awesome that you have come to expect from me. For that I apologize. But I do ask that if you have some criticism to offer you do so more creatively than the anonymous posting of "stfu" that I got yesterday.

On the one hand I was offended by the lack of imagination shown in this commenter's post. And also confused because rereading the post I couldn't really see anything that was overly annoying, anything that would prompt the reaction of "stfu". But maybe that's just me reading my own words and unable to see any deeper meaning.

On the other hand I was flattered that my words sparked such a visceral reaction that the commenter was unable to calm down enough to form actual words or thoughts.

All in all I will be happy for this week to end and I invite you all to join with me in the joyful anticipation of the weekend. Its coming. I can feel it. And we all deserve to have a good one.

During one of my darker moments I messed around on the internets to find things to make me laugh. As always Jen Lancaster came through. All of her posts are hilarious but when she teamed up with Dave Barry? Please! Dave Barry, who's books I used to covertly read during silent reading in grade 6?! Dave Barry and Jen Lancaster? Better than my discovery of Ben & Jerry's Half Baked ice cream (which to this day continues to have a profound impact on my life) Go read it. Now.

Wasn't that so worth it?

I know.

The weather here is finally starting to catch up to the fact that its May. Which means glorious sunny weather. Even kind of warm. I mention this as a way to cleverly segue to the fact that the bus this morning? Not so much checking the weather forecast. If they had they wouldn't have blasted the heat on the bus. And the heaters are at your feet. If you're not careful you will scald your bare ankles (because its May and ladies like to wear skirts) on them. Not pleasant. Maybe we could work on that bus drivers? Otherwise, you're doing a great job, keep getting me to work on time! Okaythanks!

Also on the bus my ipod kept playing Christmas music. I know this is my fault because I don't care to learn how to remove music from my ipod, but the really messed up thing is that, even with sunshine streaming on the bus and people dressed in their spring clothes, I kind of wanted to listen to it. I have no more to offer on this shameful situation. Except...I want a hippopotamus for Christmas...

Oh and I know that you are all dying to know what is happening with my cousin's truck elbow . The short answer is that we still don't know. She has had x-rays done and now she is waiting to hear back. I maintain that its broken. She says she thought it would hurt more if it was broken. She obviously has a very high tolerance for pain and also has never broken anything. Until now.

Finally, I have saved the best, life-changing news for last.

No we didn't find an apartment.

No I don't have a new job.

No. I'm not getting a puppy either.

I promise its still life changing.

John is leaving.

His last day is June 1st. I won't have to deal with him anymore. I won't see his ugly mug first thing in the morning, or have him leer over my shoulder. I won't have to come up with pleasant responses to "what a bright skirt" or "you look orange today" (which implies that I'm fake tanned right? When in fact, I was wearing an orange shirt. A$$hat). He won't be here and my life will be better for it.

So congratulate me (unless you would rather I just shut the f*ck up in which case maybe you better just move along and stop reading?) on my good fortune. I like to believe that its a good omen for things to come. According to my horoscope (pisces) in the next 2 months things will finally start to settle down and work out. Which I'm kind of psyched for. Without John all things are possible.

Merry Thursday!

1 comment:

  1. STFU.

    Just kidding... Anyway, congratulations!!!! Life is looking up for you!

    On another note, as many times as you've mentioned Jen Lancaster, I've never checked her out (other than hoping that your now well-worn copy of Bitter is the New Black might someday finds its way to me too, haha). And today I did check her out. And that interview really, really made my day. So thank you!