Friday, June 4, 2010


We made it. Another glorious Friday. Just a few more hours until the weekend folks!

But before that, I think I have to endure an office birthday today. Not just any office birthday either. The head honcho office birthday. And you know how I love me some office birthdays (for those of you just joining us, I do not like office birthdays at all. I find them forced and often the cake is sh*t. There is no excuse for sh*tty cake). So if this is the head honcho's birthday, you know there is going to be some Grade A a$$ kissing.

Should be quite a spectacle.

Its very quiet in here today. Anna just told me that Veronica won't be in today, which I didn't realize. Apparently she has gone to Calgary for some reason? I really wish that she had mentioned that before so that I would have known.

And yes, that was sarcasm.

Hate to say it but without Veronica here, Friday is not going to feel like Friday. I think that the sound of laughter hurts Amy's soul, she seems offended when people are having fun at work. I mean I'd probably be offended too, if I had studied fashion at school with the dreams of working for a designer some day, only to end up here. She'll be here forever- remember that Turd Furgason (her brother) got his own business- she'll be working for him.

It'd be tragic if she didn't have a tendency to be such a b*tch.

Has anyone else found this week really hard to get through? Now that its Friday I find that I am exhausted. Like completely done. When I got home last night I barely had the energy to decide what to watch on TV. I'm not even kidding. I watched the news twice because I couldn't be bothered to change the channel. Is it the weather? Boredom? The comedown after the euphora experienced on John's "last" day (Anna thinks he will show his fugly [no that is not a typo] face here today for the head honcho birthday. Gotta keep up the a$$ kissing you know?)? Who knows.

I also liked the 2 back-to-back question marks, thank you for noticing.

Maybe its all the drinking I participated in this week? I'm not normally a week-day drinker (obviously there have been and will be exceptions, but that only serves to prove the rule). But this week. It happened. Often. Monday there was the celebratory rum. Tuesday there was wine before the Opera (again, because I'm classy like that). Wednesday was a bottle of wine with my friend who does my hair. After that I came home tipsy and did my nails. The results of which I'm still sporting and which I'm not totally thrilled with. A word of advice: if you are going to do your nails tipsy, a french manicure is probably not what you want to attempt.

OK Anna just told me to hurry up and post already. I didn't realize that I was on some kind of schedule. Jerk. Yeah that's right Anna, I'm calling you a jerk. On the internet. So now its true.

Some hijinx to end the week off right.

Our mail guy (mail guy, male guy, get it? hilarious yes?) took all the blue elastics and made 2 elastic balls out of them. Then he joined them together. Now we are forever passing on the "blue balls". We hang them off people's monitors, leave them on desks, whatever. Maurice had the blue balls (right? how is this not hilarious?) and passed them off to this girl who did not think it was that funny. So we all blamed Maurice and told him to stop sexually harassing people.

Would probably turn ugly if we were supervised, but Veronica is away (not that she wouldn't be joining in, she would be taking the lead) and Amy is interviewing Mensa candidates to join the "team" so...nothing is going to get done today.

I'm fine with that.


  1. Cake-time in the office is the worst, everyone sort of milling around, making uncomfortable small talk, the birthday wishes. Hate it.

    Here is my office, we have "make your own sundaes" which means you have to stand in line with your empty bowl, waiting to make you sundae while the woman from sales says she'll just have a tiny little scoop of vanilla.

    Your blog is great and fun to read while at work!

    Happy weekend!

  2. 1. I laughed out loud, alone... in my office... "Yeah that's right Anna, I'm calling you a jerk. On the internet. So now its true." People probably thing Im crazy now.

    2. interviwing Mensa candidates?! Where do you work, Nasa!?

  3. Marion: they are rationing the ice cream? Another thing that's wrong with the office birthday- the sub par treats. I'm glad you enjoy reading!!

    Kacey: they aren't actually Mensa candidates. They always seem to hire idiots. Not sure why. But they do and then they keep them on for months while I try not to kill them. I'm looking forward to the new crop!

  4. When I got laid off, a bunch of people were retiring/having their last day/not feeling very productive or happy, and the editor got a cake that said, "Thanks!" And then he made a really awkward speech. Usually, the cakes are pretty good. But he got marbled. Marbled thanks. Because you totally feel better about not having a job when you get cruddy cake. Blech. (I really shouldn't complain. He got me the job I have now. But it was an awkward day.)

  5. If you read fight club, you would understand my reference to "needing this". You should take it as a compliment when someone who is 2 cubicles away needs to read this to make it...i could easily go talk to you, but we all know that will endup with a meeting with amy about wasting work time.