An Unexpected End

When they said August 13th what they really meant, for me, was yesterday.

Yesterday was my last day in the Cubicle. Hopefully my last day ever working in any cubicle--do a lot of offices use them?

Anyway, here's what happened.

After finding out that there was only enough work to sustain the department for another 2 week, until August 13th, I spent the majority of the morning trying to figure out how to modify my plans moving forward. I was also still trying to come to terms with the fact that the Temps were working their last day. I didn't think that I could make it through the day. I decided that Amy was right and I should just take Tuesday off as well- there was no point in saving my vacation days as I wouldn't have a job for the rest of the summer anyway. I sent her a calendar notification about it.

She had sent me a calendar invite for a one-on-one meeting, supposedly so that she could answer any questions I might have about what the new end date meant for me. She wanted to have it at 2 but I really couldn't stay that much longer, I needed to go home and digest the information we have been given in the morning. So I sent a message back asking if we could please reschedule, that I wasn't feeling well and needed to go home as soon as possible.

I should also mention that in one of my more charitable Cubicle moments, I had sent an email to Amy that morning telling her that I knew that she didn't want things to have happened this way (referring to all the drama with the Temps) and that I supported her completely. She would have received it after I was gone for the day.

So I didn't hear from her and before I knew it, it was pizza party time. I stood there, surrounded by my co-workers, listening to some dipsh*t corporate drone go on about how he was so appreciative of all our hard work, that he felt like he had made some friends yadda yadda yadda. I just wanted to leave.

If I had known it would be the last opportunity to talk to anyone at work, I probably would have taken some more time to say a proper good bye.

Instead as soon as the corporate drivel was over I walked out of the room, walked up to Amy and said that I needed to go home, that I would have liked to have been able to talk to her about everything before I left on vacation, that I wouldn't be in on Tuesday after all and that I would see her on the 9th.

She got all confused and said that I couldn't leave. Then the "Good-morning-everybody!!" woman walked up to me and said that they just needed 15 minutes of my time. I should have known something was up- this woman, didn't know my name until yesterday.

I walked to the boardroom with them where I was told that it would be my last day, that I had been "terminated without cause". I get paid until August 13th, my remaining vacation days will be paid out, so will my benefits and I still get the severance. I miss out on the tuition credit (which admittedly, is a bummer). They made up some sh*t about all the problems we had had (which had been resolved over a year ago and not had to be revisited but whatever) without actually giving me a straight answer. They wanted me to sign papers so that the money would be released, but for once I had the wherewithal to not do what they wanted. Good thing too because there were some discrepancies that needed to be addressed. We are in the middle of sorting all that out now.

They offered to call me a cab and told me that my desk was being packed up as we spoke. I was left alone in the room with Amy while the other woman went to get me some water and call the cab. I didn't say anything to Amy, I was in shock. I'm still in shock. Amy told me that I probably wouldn't believe her but she didn't want it to happen this way. I do believe her. She cried. I told her not to worry about me, that this is good (I mean I still get paid like everyone else, I just don't have to suffer through any more of that crap) and I wished her good luck.

All in all, I'm proud of myself for the way I handled it.

There's no point in being angry now. I'm finally out of there and I'm going on vacation this week. When I get back I have a plan. So really, I'm good.

The one thing that I really regret is not being allowed to say good bye to everyone. I was whisked out the back way to "avoid embarassment"--I'm not sure if they meant for me or for them. I was too stunned to argue. I know that I will see Anna and Gloria again. But there are others I probably won't see again and I'm sorry for the missed chance to say good bye and tell them that I enjoyed working with them. The others, the Veronicas and the Johns--I'm not sorry to have missed seeing them again. They were a toxic waste of my energy anyway and everyone is better off without them in their lives.

I guess I will have to find a new title for the blog, a new look. I will probably take the next week off, just kind of step away from everything Cubicle-related.

Anna, Gloria, Dustin, MK- you all were a joy to work with. Thanks for making it all worth it. We will see each other again. As Lauren said to Whitney (The Hills reference)"I expected to find a job, I didn't expect to find a friend.

The rest of you, thanks for sticking with me so far. Good things are coming. I can feel it.